As some of you know, I have been in the process of moving since last July. That s when I put my house in Maine on the market and began to pack. I spent 6 months worrying about whether the house would ever sell, spending money I didn t have to make the house more appealing to prospective buyers, and sorting through all of my stuff, deciding what to keep and what to let go of (literally and metaphorically).

Then one day in early January, I was elated to receive and accept an offer on my house. The joy lasted about 24 hours. Then panic set in. I realized for all the work I had done, I still had so much to do. And more worries. What would the home inspection show? What if the buyer s couldn t get financing? What if something goes wrong at the last minute at closing?

A woman I know was recently diagnosed with an STD, Human Papilloma Virus to be exact. Not that unusual I know. But here's the thing. She's in her late 70s and hasn't been sexually active in over 35 years. It seems that her abusive ex-husband gave her the disease sometime prior to the early 1970s. It lay dormant in her system for all that time, until last year, when she received radiation treatment for breast cancer. The radiation apparently compromised her immune system, and the long dormant HPV took advantage. Her ex-husband died about 6 years ago. But he's managed to reach out from the grave to abuse her yet again.

Last week was an exhausting week for most of us. With a one week delay to give the Democratic senators time to do what they didn't do during the hearings, namely prepare for the biggest fight yet for women's rights, it gives us a chance to evaluate where we are as Democrats and how commited we are or are not to the party that seemingly has left many of us behind. It says a lot that the spat between Specter and Kennedy, that the crying jag of Martha Alito, were what made the headlines, it speaks not just to our media but also to the job the Democratic senators did or rather did not do.

When we hear on the Sunday talk shows that half of the senators didn't know what `unitary executive power' was it's like a slap in the face. When executive powers became as hot a button issue as abortion has been since Alito was nominated, I felt a rush of hope. If the Democratic and Republican senators didn't have what it takes to protect a woman's right to choose surely they would care about the place Congress has in governing this great nation of ours. Or as we saw, would they?

Our beloved Kactus has started her own blog! Let's show her some love!

http://superbabymama.blogspot.com/

Amanda over at Pandagon has a very interesting post up about mail order brides and recent changes in law that offer some new protections against domestic violence. Well worth a read.

Many of us will find ourselves visiting family and friends during this holiday season. And some of us are already dreading the oh-too-predictable drama that goes along with it. There is a concept in group dynamics called "The Drama Triangle." Developed by a guy named Stephen Karpman, it's a way of understanding certain difficult human interactions. I've used the concept in work I've done with battered women and staff at battered women's shelters. The Drama Triangle is a very gross simplification, and not the be all and end all description of human interaction. But I sometimes find it a helpful lens for understanding the dynamics of some dysfunctional interactions. Some of you may already be familiar with it, but for those who aren't, it looks like this:

The Drama Triangle